


Dangerously Loving

by MissBenevolence



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Angst, BDSM, Eventual Romance, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Love, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-12
Updated: 2019-09-04
Packaged: 2020-08-20 04:11:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20221585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissBenevolence/pseuds/MissBenevolence
Summary: The Warrior of Light knows what she should be doing.And yet she falters under his gaze.As time progresses, she is thrown into a love triangle between her, the Exarch and Emet-Selch.Despite the imminent danger of the Eulmoran Army and the threat of the Lightwardens, there still seems to be time for personal conflict to arise.A tale of love, hatred and ruthlessly unforgiving romance.





	1. Tyrannical Nuisance

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic, and I aim to update fairly regularly. Chapter 1 will be tame, and it may take a little while to get to the smut. I hope you enjoy it ♥ Feedback would be much appreciated.

“Are you really so naive, or are you pretending not to realise how much the Exarch likes you? I can see it  _ clearly _ .” The Ascian’s golden eyes bore deep into you icily. 

“Then close your eyes. It would be better for you anyway, so you could keep your commentary to yourself.” You hold a defiant posture within the shade of the Rak’tika Greatwood, scowling at your insolent  enemy nearby. 

“You’re becoming akin to Thancred as time passes. I truly am beginning to regret my show of good faith,  _ Hero _ .” An exasperated sigh comes from you as you turn away from him. Usually, you would hold your tongue for the sake of getting things done, but during a moment of reprieve, you just cannot help but snap. 

“I’m truly thankful for you saving Y’shtola, but that doesn’t diminish the fact that you are a tyrannical nuisance who’s constantly plotting against us.” Your fingers curl to make tight fists as you attempt to control your seething anger. This  Ascian , why must he add an additional layer of difficulty to everything! How you yearn to wipe his near constant smirk off his well defined face- 

“Oh? How very interesting. You should turn around and repeat that to me.” You could hear the smirk in his voice, but also a hint of something more dangerous. This causes you to falter for a moment. He is an old world Ascian after all... it would be wise to not be too brash. Hiding the creeping sense of nervousness you’re starting to feel, you swallow and turn to face the tall Emperor whose eyes search the deepest crevices of your soul with a cruel grin. “I’m truly thankful for saving Y’shtola, but...” 

“But?” 

“That doesn’t diminish the fact that you are a tyrannical nuisance who’s...” you pause as you attempt to break away from his piercing gaze. He has immense power over you right now, and you know it. He is also aware of the power imbalance present, and opts to utilise it. Emet-Selch takes an assertive step forward. You become increasingly aware of the lack of space in this vicinity as you tread back towards a nearby tree. 

“What is causing our dear  _ Hero _ to pause? Is she perhaps  scared of what I could do?” He chuckles - the bastard! You feel his power intensify as he takes a few more steps towards you... he’s looming over you now. "Just remember," he leans and whispers into your ears softly, "Provided I have the inclination, I could extirpate you like aether in the current of time." You try to maintain an air of strength and defiance, but all is lost. As a last resort, you eventually stammer, "D-Do you like me?" 

The silence that follows is deafening. It is at this point when you are greatful for the wildlife present in these woods. The everlasting light shines brightly, and you can hear birds chirping heartily nearby. This Ascian can wait for an eternity - mind you. Finally, when you feel that you’re about to lose your mind and attempt to run, a mischievous smirk creeps into his face. “What am I to do with you? The Warrior of Light, falling in love with her supposed enemy? How very interesting...” How does he assert such dominance over you? Why are you enthralled and unable to avert your gaze from his alluring eyes? You are the famed Warrior or Light - Hydaelyn’s Champion! Both of you are quite aware of this fact, yet he dares to infringe upon your personal space. Yet you are simultaneously perplexed by your inability to maintain a structured composure under his presence. How silly of you to stammer the earlier question, and knowing his personality, he would not be one to let you live it down. Before you are given the chance to respond, with a swift snap of his fingers, you are engulfed in darkness. 


	2. Seeds of Doubt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The WOL is made to talk about the Exarch within the confinement of an inn room in the Crystarium. Tension builds.
> 
> He will be back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm choosing to keep each chapter relatively short so I can update it regularly and not feel overwhelmed. I hope I've been able to create an adequate atmosphere... for those who care - the smut will be in the next chapter. ♥ I didn't want to rush things.

It is the early evening when you are whisked off to one of the Crystarium’s empty inn rooms. The transportation had taken you by surprise, yet you quickly stabilise yourself and take the opportunity to look away from Emet-Selch. Unfortunately, his gaze is still piercing through you, but you are granted a period of time in which you can speak freely without feeling bewitched by him. “Just what do you think you’re doing?” The buildup in annoyance in your voice becomes very clear to the Ascian, and yet he does not falter. Instead, he takes a small step back and observes you in your entirety. “Answer me!”

“A touch of privacy felt fitting for our impending conversation.” You can hear the condescending tone in his voice, and he finishes his comment with a teasing laugh. “Now, let us begin shall we? Why don’t you inform me of your truest opinion of the Exarch… I’m curious if you hold him in such high regard.” This is a challenge - it has to be. It feels tempting to deflect the question and focus solely on his motives, though the futility of it causes you to opt for a direct approach; answering the question.

And so you begin. Initially mentioning your apprehensions of the Exarch, then your pleasant surprise as he continues to take care of you despite being unfamiliar with you. Seeing his genuine kindness towards your peers leaves a tender touch on your heart. If Emet-Selch is uncomfortable with what’s said, he gives nothing away as he silently listens to your ramblings. Hence, you take a defiant approach to attempt to negate the scandalous feelings you have for the Ascian. Oh how you simply wish that he was of the Source so you could court him! How his wonderful personality is a trait that you admire greatly. Unlike the person nearby you… he is respectful and has your best interests at heart. Mind you - the only reason you are able to continue for so long is because you are still not looking at Emet directly. “So, with all that in mind… the Crystal Exarch is simply charming.”

A gloved hand is softly placed on your shoulder. The free hand is running up and along your other arm. A warm body is gently pressing up behind you. Each move is meticulously calculated. Curse you! Why did you garner yourself in summer clothing? Now your skin is all exposed for him to make use of to his heart’s content. “…Is that so?” What is he even questioning? You stated many things - but wait? What did you even say? It seems that Emet-Selch doesn’t need to maintain eye contact to employ a degree of control over you. His voice falls to a whisper. “Do you even know who he is?” And thus the seeds of doubt are planted. Plotting and scheming to his heart’s content, and you are non the wiser. With sudden movement, he prises himself off you and calls out into the open. “Can you leave us alone? I _need_ to concentrate.” How does he know-

“He’s jealous, albeit pleased that you showered him with praise...” Emet begins. You can feel his coy smile burning into your back. “For someone who’s _simply charming_, it’s a wonder how you quiver at my touch.” His warmth returns on your back as you develop a sense of brain fog. It is all-consuming, so blissfully delightful... but as you think of who and what he is, you resist the urge to give into his advances.

“Is it a problem if I like him?” You growl. “If anything, I should question why you insist on whisking me away from the Greatwood. What do you hope to achieve? To respond to your final words there, I don’t love you. I will never love someone like you.”

His grip tightens for a moment, then loosens as if your words had greatly wounded him. However, you begin to doubt your suspicions as he re-secures his firmness as soon as he had loosened himself. "One day... you're going to take those words back. We'll speak later, _Hero_."

With that, he was gone.

What did he mean to imply? Somewhere deep within you, you feel a pang of sadness that quickly washes away. Taking a deep breath, you regain equilibrium and resolve to seek out the companionship of the Exarch before calling it a day. Perhaps he would be able to put your raging mind at ease?


	3. Scandalous Desire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emet-Selch pays the WOL a visit later that night. It is sooner rather than later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the delay. I became a bit lazy, then I've been quite sick over the past week. I'm still unwell but stuck to my goals! 
> 
> This is my first time ever writing about anything lewd, so it may look primitive. Feedback would be much appreciated. The dirty deeds will come in time, I'm giving some flavour in this chapter though. I don't want plotless smut, so it will progressively become more lewd as their relationship develops over time. :)

The conversation with the Exarch has cheered you up immensely. You notice that he does not mention earlier’s events, and in all honesty, you would rather it kept that way. As you head back to your inn room, you reflect on various snippets of conversation. The feeling of his cool hand placed upon your shoulder as he encourages you to keep fighting. The small yet secretive smile on his face when you beam at him in earnest.Your heart begins to thump faster at the thought.

_Yet it is different to the feeling that He gave you._

What did Emet-Selch mean by later? The first time he said that, he barely gave you enough time to think straight before appearing within the ocular. Regardless, it is pointless to worry about it. Closing the inn door behind you as letting out a resounding sigh, you decide to get some rest. Hopefully the others wouldn’t have noticed your disappearance...

You soon fall asleep with a smile.

_Suffocating... suffocating under a heavy blanket of darkness._

_Terrifying shrieks causing my ears to ring._

_Why, why did it come to this?_

_As I close my eyes and await death's embrace..._

_Oh, Hydaelyn... Hades...!_

The bed is soaked with sweat when you wake up screaming. Many dreams consist of immaterial activities, yet you are sure that this one holds great meaning. _Hydaelyn, Ha... Ha... _What of subsequent identity? It becomes a struggle to grasp onto the memory as it wishes to flow free into the wind.

_What of this anguish that burns in my breast?_

_Why! _You curse yourself as an intrusive thought pushes the former out into the open. This peculiar event would surely necessitate a cold cup of water. 

_What causes the unwilling slump in my posture as I endeavour to perform a mundane task?_

The water is a suiting refreshment that acts as a revitaliser and causes one’s temperature to lower. The calm that ensues lessens the burden of the ordeal. A few deep breaths are all you need to regain composure. All is well.

But as they say, there’s always a calm before the storm. 

The peace is short lived. You already know what's happening. "Well well well, Hero. I did say we'd speak later." The Ascian's words are laced with venom - a deep chill circulates the room as you turn around. “Not surprised, are we? Perhaps I must needs refine my tricks.” He has you under his aetheric grasp, even within the supposed safety of the darkness. _Crap! _Is fleeing the only option? You are simply not ready for an encounter such as this. “Also, if you think escaping is a viable option, you’re sorely mistaken.” Your brain is frantically seeking out a solution to this. Just why is he here at a time where you happen to be vulnerable? Time is running out, so you resort to opening your mouth and letting out a resounding scream-

Your sound is muted. Emet-Selch is using a mere fragment of his power over you, this is made clear by how he lazily approaches your frozen body. The next thing you know, you are roughly pushed against a wall. His anger, his hatred, his disregard... these feelings you can sense. But, for no apparent reason, he softens his hold and carefully strokes your cheek. The icy chill in the room begins to warm - albeit slightly. Your eyes have become mostly accustomed to the dark, and you look deep into his golden eyes, which looks back at you coldly. Yet behind the frozen walls, do you see... melancholy? Unfortunately it's too difficult to tell. A gentle kiss is placed on your forehead which is comforting. Too comforting. What does he think he's doing? This is simply unfathomable! You begin to squirm uncomfortably as a harsh realisation of your differences comes to haunt you. In response, he holds you painfully, and just as you're about to try and voice your discomfort, his soft lips come crashing against yours. His tongue demands entrance and you find yourself unable to refuse; he is given free rein to explore your mouth. After a moment of hesitation, you find yourself kissing him back with just as much passion.

_I should be seething with rage and yet the dangerous flame in my soul is being extinguished by his lust._

It feels as though eons has passed before he slows himself down. A brief moment of reprieve is welcomed, but as you are just about to start processing what has just happened, he pushes you over to the bed and places some of his body weight on you. From here, he goes right back into his deep passionate kisses. Despite the force employed, why do you take pleasure in it? Distracted from the action, you are taken by surprise when you hear a snap of his fingers with your body feeling significantly more chilly after. You're scantily clad- laid before him in your small-clothes, and the cheeky bugger has opted to keep his on! If that is not an overt declaration of dominance, you don't know what is. He roams and explores your body to his heart's content. In the darkness, his gaze is unreadable. Oh how you wish to see his face in full clarity. After some time one of his hands makes its way over to your panties. Pressing gently onto your arousal, you hear him smirk. “What an _unexpected _surprise. The Warrior of Light succumbing to the darkness. Oh, I can feel how wet you are.”

“...Please.” Within that one word lies scandalous desire and desperation for his attention. No longer are you shackled by the weight of abnormality about the situation. Perhaps it was by design, that you would give yourself up in your most vulnerable and exposed state before him. No matter though, for your wanting grows uncontrollably. But he does not comply with your need. Instead, he whispers into your ear, “You will never love someone like me....” The statement is packed with hatred and jealousy. When you do not respond, he gets up from the bed and looms over you. “I said that one day, you’re going to take those words back. You will learn. But as I’m a gentleman, I will cease my current onslaught. ”

“A gentleman, after this?!” You angrily retort. You are unsure if your anger stems more from being teased and unattended to, or from the absurdity of the situation. Or perhaps, you have the horrid realisation that you may indeed have some feelings for the ancient. When he disappears into the shadows with no response, you are left open-mouthed at where he once stood.


	4. Envy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is from the Exarch's perspective.  
I'd like to think that beneath the cowl lies just a 'teeny' bit of jealousy. We look at things through his perspective in this chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to add more depth to this fanfic, so although it will still be written in second person, it'll be through different character's perspectives at times. I hope this chapter was okay ♥ I haven't committed to writing a full on fanfic before so it is hard to keep motivated.

** From the Exarch’s perspective. **

He is situated within the Ocular, as usual. He is stood tall whilst lost in deep thought. How long has it been since he had last been with his family before becoming one with the Crystal Tower? At the time, he had been a young man - near blinded with admiration from the Warrior of Light from history. To be granted an opportunity to give aid to her and prevent the Eighth Umbral Calamity, despite the many consequences which would include his own demise after successfully completing such endeavour, would be an upmost honour to him. To be able to see her in person after many long years was beyond what he could’ve ever imagined. He puts you on a pedestal so very high that it goes beyond one put upon a friend.

With a sigh, he becomes fixated on the word friend. That’s the relationship status between you both. What is the point of thinking of this, when he has already offloaded his feelings on such things on Lyna? She advised him that it was much too early to confront you about it - imminent danger aside. Furthermore, upon completion of your adventures, would you not have other commitments elsewhere? But she wouldn’t understand, would she? The naive guard hasn’t seen what he’s had the displeasure of casting his nosey eyes upon. Nevertheless, there will not be an after. She is blind to the truth. No one but Urianger is aware of his intentions to sacrifice himself to save you. The futility of his thoughts hits him in the face with all the force that reality could muster. But _ hey _, a Miqo'te could dream, right?

The Exarch can see everything thanks to the Crystal Tower and its various functions. Usually, he will preoccupy his time by overseeing the actions within the Crystarium, ensuring that there’s no brewing danger from the sin eaters. If he wills it, he could also observe the activities of the scions... though he would much prefer to grant them the privacy that they deserve. As of late, he has taken interest in observing your actions. He knows that his undertakings are morally questionable, and for this reason he grants seclusion in your more _ intimate _ moments. However, he cannot resist continuing his escapades.

With regret, he is aware that there are always two sides of a coin. Whilst most of the time he has indulged in your adventures of slaying lightwardens, he has also had the displeasure of casting his eyes upon Emet-Selch and his advances in the Greatwood. Of course! How could he forget that the Ascian also takes his opportunities to observe within the safety of the shadows. That along with his age old cleverness and intuition, he is a force to be reckoned with. To be so candid with you ruins all the carefully laid plans thought out. Emet-Selch is simply a spanner in the works, initially when he had first conversed with fiend in within the Ocular, he was mostly clueless at how troublesome he would prove to be.

The sheer thought of the situation in the inn room the previous evening causes the Exarch to release an irritable sigh. There is an important piece of this puzzle that he’s missing, and he’s not sure that he will ever figure it out. Why is Emet-Selch taking time out of his day to spend time with you in such a personal manner? Although… he chuckles to himself. The way you praised him would cause his beating heart to almost burst with hope and desire. Is that what you truly think? Despite Lyna’s warnings, it would almost be unwise to not use this to his advantage. But if he did, you would know it was because he was eavesdropping… no - he cannot risk losing such a precious friendship due to his selfish wants! Furthermore, his time is rather limited. Regardless… he would have loved to be her knight in shining armour at that moment. It may be considered selfish, but it should’ve been his hands placed lustily upon her shoulders - _ he _ should’ve been the one to cause your breath to hitch! As if the situation couldn’t become any worse, Emet-Selch had the impertinence to sow the seeds of doubt before calling him out on his observing.

He slams his staff into the ground.

The situation is complex. He cannot simply remove his cowl, that would be detrimental to his very purpose of being here. Needless to say, he should focus on the current issues at hand before giving into his personal longings if given an opportunityn . And yet... oh how his heart flutters so whilst reminiscing on the conversation with you later that evening! "...and he had the audacity to run with the pot of food and eat it all by himself!" He had told you all about a funny tale from his childhood at one point. The way you threw your head back and roared with laughter would brigten up the rest of his days. You had placed your gentle hands upon his shoulder to stabilise yourself and it took all his strength for him to not swoon at your touch. It is moments like these where he wishes time would stop. The Crystal Tower may be home to an insurmountable level of power, but it is likely not capable of stopping time. Although it would prove to be incredibly useful.

Sigh. It’s immoral - unforgivable, even! He watched last night’s activities between the two of them. This would haunt him until he has to sacrifice himself for the one he cares for deeply. Compared to Emet-Selch however... the ascian had crossed the line on what is deemed acceptable.

“...Please.”

How could such a word be uttered from your lips? You must have been forced in some way to want it. There is no way you could fall for such tactics dripping in debauchery. It is _ incomprehensible _. One way or another, he will prevent this relationship - if you could even call it that - from coming into fruitition. You belong to him, and him alone, for as long as time will allow it.

The Exarch snaps out of his thoughts and turns to face the portal. Using his staff, he conjures up a view of your location. Currently, you are frantically explaining to Thancred about your whereabouts since the previous evening. The truth is not uttered from your lips, he notices. The Warrior of Light should hold no secrets from her scion friends, yet there you are with a hidden air of mystery surrounding you.

** I wonder. Would Emet-Selch be watching too? **


	5. Upon further inspection...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emet-Selch ponders to himself within the safety of the shadows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I applaud people who update frequently. It really is difficult! I have all these ideas but putting them down is hard. The next chapter should be filled with action! Since I'm going to uni soon updates are slow - I'm just so busy! :(

Once again he is an observer in the shadows. From here, he can show an uncontrolled level of amusement at you, who is presently trying to dodge Thancred’s onslaught of questions. “Just remember, we have Lightwardens to slay, with limited time in which to do it!” Thancred scolds. “You’ve also been giving me half answers, where exactly have you been?” 

“I.. I simply retired to the Crystarium to rest a little after feeling overwhelmed by Y’shtola almost being lost to us again.” A moment of hesistation ensues. 

“...I concede, you have been working hard. Nevertheless, I will be keeping an eye on-"

“Thancred! Minfilia has need of you. It would be wise to give her aid as soon as possible.” Y’shtola has stepped in to prevent anything from escalating. You give her a thankful smile as Thancred relents and heads off to assist the young girl. Of course, you would not dare to utter the truth from your lips, that he had been the reason for the delay in any activity. It would comical to view Thancred’s reaction at such a revelation, however. 

Emet-Selch shuts his eyes once boredom returns. Halfmen, the lot of them. Pitiful broken souls. They are completely unaware of what they  _ once _ were. The Scions here are at a blatant advantage here on the other hand due to them being from the Source. They stand only to gain - if they can survive the remaining calamities, that is. This would be the only logical reason why it would be beneficial to use them for his own benefit. Once Zodiark can once again be manifested, all remaining life can be sacrificed to restore the world to the way it was... the way it should rightfully be. With their ephemeral existence, it would be many of their lifetimes before this would come into fruitition. Being the patient ancient he is, this is no problem for him. He has been around for eons, after all. Recently though, he has found himself becoming quite the opposite in certain situations. First of all, you and your Scion accomplices has ruined the ascians’ carefully laid plans for this star. Whilst he could simply wait for you to meet your natural demise, it is not guaranteed that another set of so-called heroes would haul the star from the brink of its demise yet again! Nay, it would be more appropriate to instead measure the group’s worth or put them out of their sundered misery. 

Secondly, he has taken attraction to you. It is only natural with a soul such as that, he would falter and yearn for more. Emet-Selch smiles sadly to himself. You fail to realise what you  _ could _ be - utter perfection. Part of him could settle for you being seven times rejoined. How could he resist? Every fragment of your soul has displayed similar qualities; a pure selflessness that is simply alluring, it is just rougher on the edges. Over the eons, he has grown accustomed to the ways of man. It goes without a doubt that he harbours desires for you. He could fulfil the demands of his vessel, but what he craves for goes beyond the physical realm. A union of souls, this is the pinnacle of togetherness. To perform such an act with a broken soul would be dangerous to say the least. Regardless, you don’t even remember who he truly is. It would be an utter waste of time and energy. Imperfection taints you, Hydaelyn’s influence another barrier between his desires and reality. How could this be? All you had to do was believe in his words and together you could’ve stayed together for an age. Instead, walking away from the convocation - from HIM, was the decision made. The choice that cost the star! Resentment boils from within, and if it weren't for his grief that is all-consuming, he may have fell apart at the strength of the emotion. In spite of this information, a part of him cannot resist the temptation to try. It has been eons since he has indulged in such pleasures. 

Before he continues his conquest to vanquish boredom, it would be best to wait until you have defeated the lightwarden of the Rak'tika Greatwood. If your soul can contain the light, it would further prove your worthiness to him. You've been doing well so far... perhaps man's soul is robust enough to bear such burden. Emet-Selch quickly corrects himself.  _ Your _ soul. The scion accomplices and every other wanting mortal's power is near insignificant to the likes of you. 

Time passes ever so slowly. Back in the time when he had lived as Solus zos Galvus, his wife was yet another fragment of you. Although mortal pleasures do not come close to the likes of soul unification, admittedly it was still enjoyable. Using his power and seeing you squirm beneath in begging for more... teasing you endlessly leaving you pleading for his touch. With each lustful and hateful thrust he would relish the satisfaction of hearing you scream in pain and delight. He had loved you because you were once  _ her _ . He had detested you because you were once _h_ _ er _ . This has been a common pattern for all other fragments, with the exception of you now. Whilst capable of contempt, it is not strong enough to be considered loathing. Is it because you are more whole, or is it the tiredness over epoch venturing to resurrect his fallen brethren? Irrespective of the reasoning, Emet-Selch can accept that he is rather fond of you now. 

_ Tick. Tock.  _

It would be pleasant to sow some seeds of chaos to pass the time. Would he even be considered an Ascian without causing some trouble along her addventures? It would be best to amuse himself at the very least. Decision made, he leaves the comfort of the shadows and settles in a new location - one which is near enough for him to observe you with great interest, but far enough to go unnoticed.


End file.
